Lord, That I May See

Turtle to Rosebud: "Hey, you wanna go potty with me?"

1. I made peach cobbler for my family this week . . . Turtle's still asking me for more of that yummy "cobb-aler" ************************* 2. I vacuumed under the master bed for the first time since we moved here a year ago, AND I let the girls help. The dust was phenomenal. We didn't find the important little play kitty we were looking for though. :( ************************* 3. I managed to come up with and remember most of the words to about 30 children's songs in a row as I was pushing the girls on the hammock. They kept swinging and swinging and demanding another and another one. No repeats were allowed and while some of my songs got rejected outright, (why??) most of them passed muster, thankfully!

I recently made a new work for Turtle about Animal Habitats. This was a bit challenging for her at first, but now she knows to take advantage of the "self-correcting" aspect of Montessori works to get it right. :) I think that it will be a good work to make more challenging down the road with more pictures of habitats, different and more animals to match to them, etc. I started with four environments (l to r, top to bottom): the Forest, the Jungle, the Arctic and the African Savana. I have two more in the closet to bring out later -- the Farm and the Coral Reef/Ocean. Four animals correspond to each. Deer, Squirrel, Black Bear and Fox for the Forest. Tiger, Monkey, Leopard and Panda Bear for the Jungle (I think that's kind of a stretch, but I had to work with the animals that I had!). Beluga whale, Killer whale, Polar Bear and Sea Lion for the Arctic. Giraffe, Lion, Lizard and Elephant for the Savana. This is how she can check her work when finished. The environment pictu...

I read a note on Facebook the other night. It was written by one of my wingmates from senior year of college. She is expecting her first and in her note she wrote of the joy she finds in carrying her child, her intimacy with Mary, the beauty and the privilege of pregnancy, the happiness of living out her vocation. It's beautifully written. But, upon reading it I cried onto my keyboard. They were tears of disillusionment and disappointment. Tears of guilt and frustration. And these are familiar tears to me these days. When I think back to my pregnancy with Turtle, I think of how happy and in awe we were. I think of how excited I was about all the newness and how in love I was with that baby. I thought of her often, cradled my hands around her every chance I got, played her classical music, sang to her and danced with her. I think I even wrote her a poem. And now, this time around, it is so different. And I don't want it to be different. When I took the pregnancy test in the wee ...

1. I planned a two-week dinner menu after ages of being too tired/lazy to do it. It makes all things related to dinner SO much easier! *********** 2. I went to bed at 9:53pm last night. I even was awake enough to remember to say and actually finish my prayers. And then I got -- wow! -- 8 hours of sleep. Well, not un-interrupted, but hey, it counts . . . :) ************ 3. I scrubbed my kitchen floor. (When was the last time I did this? Probably before I got pregnant . . .no joke.) At Faith & Family Live , lots of mothers are sharing their small successes, because who doesn't need a little positive thinking in what could too easily be seen as a week of failures? Go and visit!

Well, these days, we are all growing around here. Baby #3 and Mommy are, for sure. I feel like I have a 4 month pregnant belly instead of a 3 month one -- how it is, I suppose, the more you have. But according to the midwives, the baby is right where it should be at 15 weeks, with a cute little swishing heartbeat. :) A lot of other growth is happening here, too. It is reminding me how quickly children change and how quickly they move from one to another milestone of knowledge or skill. It is so bittersweet. Every day they are a little bit different, and little bit more of some new older self and less of their younger self. Turtle: can buckle her sandals. Her new pair of sandals is the kind with a real buckle, not just velcro, and it takes a loonnng time, but she can do it! recognizes the letter "t" that starts her name. I just ordered a used set of sandpaper letters on ebay and she is so excited. I have given her a lesson on "s," "t" and "r" an...

So far this pregnancy has been emotionally difficult for me. Among other things, I've had difficulty feeling bonded with this baby. Last night I had a dream. My baby was born, a baby boy. The nurse told me his name was Joe. :) I don't remember much, but I remember that he looked about 3 or 4 months old. I laid him on the bed and bent over him. And he looked at me straight in the eyes and smiled and smiled. His whole face was alight with the joy of seeing me and he smiled so hard he couldn't keep his eyes open. And in that fraction of a moment, I was filled with joy too. And I smiled back at him and said: "I'm so happy to see you and I'm so glad you're here with me!"

7:15am -- She has peed through her diaper all over the bed. 7:30 -- I change her sheets 7:50 -- She demands to get back in her bed with Turtle to play with their "softies" (sheepskins) and dolls. She's in underwear. I wonder briefly if this is a good idea. 7:55 -- She pees in her bed again. 8:00 -- I strip her bed. There aren't any more clean sheets, so . . . 8:05 -- I start a load of laundry 8:10 -- I get her clean underwear 8:20 -- She wants to wash her hands. She gets her clothes soaking wet. 8:30 -- I change her into dry clothes. 8:40 -- Breakfast-time. She twice dumps a glass of berry smoothie everywhere. 9:00 -- She poops in her underwear. 9:01 -- I clean her up, rinse out her underwear and get her clean pants. 9:15 -- She commences throwing marbles -- about 20 -- all over the room. They scatter and roll EVERY.WHERE. 9:16 -- We pick them up, one by one. 5 are missing. Who cares. The marbles get taken away. 9:25 -- She climbing on the dining room table and stars ...

Upon starting out for a walk at 6:30, I discover that my dress shoes left a blister on my heel that renders it impossible to continue in any footwear besides flip-flops. So frustrating, considering I actually dragged myself out of bed to do this. I return home, thinking maybe I'll grab a bit of spiritual reading time. But no, the girls are up. And they're energetic too. . . . Rosebud's new favorite activity is standing on a chair in the kitchen letting the water dispenser on the counter (of non-tap, drinking water) run and run and run, till someone notices the huge puddle. I clean that up. Getting a box of blocks out of the closet for the girls, the bottom gives way and heavy blocks fall on my feet, cutting my toes. Rosebud decides to put her head down into the pee she has just made on the floor, requiring her to have a bath and a hair wash. (And no, I have never before washed pee out of a child's hair either, thank you.) I slip in the aforementioned pee, which has turn...

1. I printed and laminated this Whole & Half Fruit work for Turtle and did it with her this afternoon after Rosebud was in bed (thus giving up some of my precious quiet time for her.) She enjoyed it and I remembered to kiss her when we were done and tell her that I liked working with her. The poor thing had a morning of frustration, so I think that it did her good. ****************************** 2. I made a small sacrifice to comfort and help a friend this week. It wasn't as much of a sacrifice as I thought it would be. Success all around. :) ***************************** 3. I have washed, dried and put away (this being the key! :) 10 loads of laundry between Monday and this morning -- more than usual for me. Now, I'm laundry-free till next Monday. Yay! Come visit Faith & Family Live to read about and celebrate more Small Successes.

We went blueberry picking with friends last week. Turtle picked and then promptly ate about a pint. :) Then she dutifully picked another whole pint that she said was "hers" to take home. She had a great time! Rosebud ran up and down grabbing handfuls of green berries and throwing them on the ground. When she was done with that activity, she tried to get everyone else's picked blueberries and "mash" them in her hands. When both of those modes of entertainment were denied her, she gave up and cried. Maybe next year she will enjoy blueberry picking more. :) We ended up with a little over 2 pints of blueberries to take home. We made blueberry pancakes and also a fruit salad for the 4th of July.

1. I've eaten dinner with my family two nights this week. I think this evening nausea is subsiding a little bit. A little over one week of the first trimester left! *************** 2. I got a 1.5 hr nap today. That definitely makes me feel like a more successful person on several levels. :) **************** 3. I've been sticking to this potty training thing. It's hard going. And most days I really want to give up. But I haven't. I know that Rosebud can get it. She is a smart little girl. It would be a hard, new "work" for anyone and I just need to be patient with her and consistent. My successes are really small this week, but it's good to look for them anyways! Come see more successes at Faith and Family Live.