Car Riding Woes

Recently, any kind of length of car trip with Turtle in the back seat has become something that ranks rather high on my list of Things I Wish I Would Never Have to Do.

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This is how it goes (interject whiny voice into most of these):

Mommy, I want my music on. . . . Please. I said please. No, not THAT song, the OTHER song.

Why're you turning that way? Oh MOMMY, mommy you didn't stop at that stop sign! . . . No, you didn't . . . No you didn't, I didn't see you stop!

Those cars aren't stopping at the red light! No, they're not. They are not paying attention! Why're they doing that?

Oh, a fire engine. Why don't I hear it? Why's it not making noise?

Oh, Mommy, I see an escalator (excavator)! Oh, why is it not orange? It's supposed to be orange! Oh, it can be black or yellow too? Oh.

Mommy, that's not the way to go. The other way is the way to _____ (insert destination here)___, not that way! MOMMY!

Mommy, mommy, why are you turning around? . . . Yes, you are! You are turning around, I see you turning around. Oh, you're just turning onto another road? Okay.

Oh, Mommy? Are we going on the highway?? Nooooo! I don't wanna go on the highway! Is it gonna be a short time or a long time? Oh, a medium time? I wanna short time . . .

Mommy, drive faster! Oh, you might bump those cars? Oh. I really want you to drive faaaster.

Can I roll my winnow down? But I want to! Just a little bit? Just a teeny bit? Oh, when we get off the highway?

Moooommmmy, I don't want you to roll your winnow down, it makes my hair go in my eyes! . . . But I don't like it!

Are we off the highway yet? Are we off yet? Mommy, are we off the highway yet? It's taking sooooo long. . . . It's so loooong.

Mommy, [Rosebud's] looking at me . . .
Mommy, she's saying "no" to me. . .
Mommy, she's saying "hi [Turtle]" and I don't wanna say hi to her.


Mommy, are we going to the bank? We are? Are we going to Daddy's bank or our bank? No! This isn't our bank, its Daddy's bank! (Our personal and business checking accounts used to be a separate banks and Turtle hasn't figured out that hasn't been the case for many months.)

Mommy I want some stickers from the bank!

Mommy, are we going to the food store? Or a different store? I wanna go to the hamster store. But I waaaaant tooooo!

Can we get some cereal? Can we get a balloon? Can we get some lollipops? But I waaaant to get some looollipoppps!


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I think someone'd better raise my insurance premiums. Turtle is a serious liability to one's level of driving sanity.
It's no wonder I get headaches all the time.
My dad laughed when I complained to him the other day about Turtle, saying how I'd take a baby or a 2 year old over a 3 year old any day. He said "Oh, you'll be in this stage of raising children for a looong time to come."
Great.
I am dreading the five hour car ride to the beach.
Literally.
Dreading.

Comments

Heather said…
Oh, I'm so glad we won't be in your car. :) I'm not laughing at you dearie (well, not very hard, anyways!)...because, after all, my turn is coming soon enough. :)
Lol, hang in there! My running commentary from the peanut gallery is more along the lines of, "Mama, go faaaaaaster! Go faster Mama! GO FASTER!" ::insert reminder to use inside voice in the car:: "Mama, bump those cars! BUMP THEM!" Gracie now pipes up, "dump dem!!!" ::insert frustrated reminder to use inside voice:: "Mama, you're my beeeeeeessst friend and I love you sooooo much!" Little mooch, lol ;)
Little Things said…
LOL...I would love to tell you that the five hour ride will go well, but...well you know. At least it will be worth it when you get there. :) We have instuted a no talking rule for the double stroller, maybe you could institute one for the car.
Elizabeth said…
:) I like Jessica's no talking rule. :) Oh dear, MT, I am sorry! I will pray for 5 hours of sleep in the car....
M. T. said…
Ooo, "no talking rules" would be bliss! Sometimes I say "Mommy doesn't want to talk right now she's just going to be QUIET." But that elicits whining "Moooommy, but I NEED somebody to taaalk tooo. I don't wanna talk to my sister, I wanna talk to yoooooou." *Sigh*
emptee A said…
Goodness! That sounds difficult! I do remember intentionally giving F., an eye infection when we were in the car once years ago........